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We already have to do that around our ex, in order to attempt to co-parent.

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When we as dads take our children out in public, it is not uncommon to be asked where their mom is, or hear comments about us pulling “mommy duty” for the day.

It’s almost as if people assume that if we have a penis, we are incapable of caring for a child for more than a couple hours without some kind of assistance or intervention from their mother.

But once I suddenly had her half the time, it became almost impossible for us to make plans together.

She had children too, so trying to balance both of our schedules and find evenings that we were both kid-free just put more and more stress on our relationship.

No, I’m not talking about being physically beautiful, or being “arm candy” (although that is great too.) We want to be able to take you to company functions and family reunions, and as we are leaving, we want our bosses, our coworkers, or that old slightly-senile uncle who always smells suspiciously like whiskey to pull us aside and tell us we better hang onto you, because you’re a keeper.

You can talk to any single dad, and the odds are at one time or another, they have trusted too much and had that trust broken—either by their child’s mother, or by someone they dated after her.Hell, once they can eat and get dressed on their own, they can practically babysit themselves, right?In the four years since the birth of my daughter and the end of my relationship with her mother, I have done some dating.At that point, after more than our share of failed relationships, we both genuinely thought we had found “the one.”◊♦◊The day I was granted equal custody of my daughter fell smack-dab right in the middle of our relationship, and looking back, it was a defining moment for us—the day I can pinpoint as the beginning of the end.When I only had my daughter four days out of the month, it was easy to just plan our dates and adventures around those days.When we did find time to see each other, we were both so exhausted from work and taking care of our children, that we barely had enough energy left to sit on the couch watching Netflix until we passed out.

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